pictures i found from my-old-pictures-albums tour. look at my face. haha. hopefully, i don’t change a lot (it means that i still look young! haha, i wish). it was a holiday to china during winter, 5 or 6 years back. i miss family times. yes, cheesy.

i’m still preparing for exam. so no interesting stories until i finish everything. but i’m trying to have fun with the exam stuffs. for good result’s sake. haha. and good news: i’m a sport geek now. sport everyday! haha. seriously proud of myself for the loss of some kilos yet i still find that the fat around cheeks are the hardest part to burn. that’s the answer why i still look this chubby. but i’m still working on it.

anyway, my apology for the incovenience caused to your computer when you were trying to access this blog few days earlier. virus whatsoever. but everything has been sorted out so this blog is now safe!

gotta back to study stuff. talk later ! xx

photo courtesy ultrasparky

Dear mom and dad,
i miss you! (i can never grow up, i think. i put their picture as my profile picture on facebook. i want them soon! )

Dear blackberry,
ok, enough. i got it that you want to retire very soon. please, be nice at least until i have enough money with me to get your replacement. i’m begging you.

Dear fat,
i am so glad that you bits by bits go away from my body. 3 more kilos, please.

Dear chubby cheeks,
i wish i could thank God for your existence. haha. well, maybe someday i will. it’s just because the term “chubby is cute” is not for me. ever.

Dear boyfriend,
i’m so glad you nail it. keep on praying, struggling, and being humble. then the rest is His part. and i’m always at your back!

Dear moody weather,
in particular the UK’s… if there’s one that’s allowed to have mood swing, it’s supposed to be me. not you. your mood swing is even worse than mine. haha. i guess i’ve been trying so hard to be your friend.

Dear that pair of shoes,
i want you. soon.

Dear that bag,
i also want you. very soon.

Dear research project,
please just cope with me later when the time comes that i need to take a good care of you, ok?

Dear water in my bathroom,
i have no clue how you could escape and resulted in leakage that made the electricity went down. that’s bad. should i tell landlady to get the plumber fix you?

Dear campus’ gym centre and Queen’s park,
you are indeed my new playground. haha.

Dear exam,
i’m gonna beat you!

Dear God,
i thank You for everything. and for You’re always there. good or bad. and for it is You in the less of me.

well, please don’t laugh. i’m going to be a bit dramatic melancholy here. PERIOD! haha.

i was just suddenly awakened by the fact that i’m almost a quarter of a century. damn. some of my friends and relatives have got a settled job, some have got married and even have become a mother. or any kinds of achievements whatsoever. of course i’m happy for them. it just gets me thinking what i have done so far? then i come to realise i haven’t done any of such serious things. i even have got no idea about where i will live after graduation, where i will work, if i will be able to get a job here in the UK, how i will afford my life, and when i will get married (haha!). blank. guess i’m still left far behind. it is even harder when people in our surrounding define happiness under those parameters. and with or without our consciousness, it little by little interferes with our own idea of happiness. things become even worse when we have to face the same questions whose answers honestly still can’t be figured out haha. sort of … suffering. trust me. i’m a master here. haha.

i’m now still bleedingly struggling to survive the college stuffs, to graduate with at least merit, to motivate myself study hard, to control my desire on shopping and travelling, to adjust with the new life in the UK and all those stuffs, to overcome my mood swings, to cook better time to time, to lose some weight (haha). in short, i’m still working out how to be a better me because i personally think that i’m a sort of childish at heart, as in all aspects of life (behaviour, way of thinking, interests). haha. although my face doesn’t look like i’m young. haha. well, it isn’t something i’m proud of, seriously. i just want to be ready when i have to. and it requires a hard learning (tougher than learning those crazy modules of university i reckon)

people said being 20 something is hard but it’s supposed to be fine no matter what. maybe we need to define our own happiness and care not about people’s perception. i have dreams and hopes. and i certainly include those parameters of achievements and happiness mentioned above to my dreams and hopes. maybe time wants to teach me to be patient, to learn more about self-management and self-development, and to let me enjoy being myself with a-no-pressure-life until one day those serious life stages come for real. things might be much easier and looser when we gratefully live the life at our own pace. i know nothing what tomorrow will bring. i only know that He is who holds tomorrow, so why shall we worry?

excuse my rambling. blame it to period. ahaha! maybe i should take this post as a turning point from a “childish” me into a little bit “more mature” me. (drumroll and triumph as backsound) haha.

and i acted weirdly as you see above. haha. well, i just found a new playground, rollip. and a little bit played. it is a good one (no license needed haha!) oh well, that’s the dress i mentioned in several posts back. haha.

established since 1919, this restaurant is a famous destination in York for the travellers. a lot of delicious cakes to satisfy my tongue and tummy. i did try the salmon fish cake with spinach sauce as main dish as well. so heaven! oh and the decoration is darling. ok, i just can’t stop worshipping. i know i’m a sucker to sweet stuffs and nice places to eat in. haha. (i didn’t exactly remember the name of the cake i tried. i just remember they tasted magnificent! haha)

what amused me the most is the fact that it owns a cookery school which we can enroll for short course. and laugh all you like, i was tempted to be in. haha. sounds good to fill in free days after dissertation and holiday. haha. don’t be surprised if you see me a master in the future. hhaha.